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Crap Day? 3 Steps So You Can Switch It Around

By on September 2, 2015
mentallytired

So your day started out badly. Here are three steps to turning it around. They are not that hard. They just take effort. and willingness. Ahhhh  Attitude is a difficult thing to change without willingness.

by Jennifer Rollin (MindBodyGreen.com)

Maybe you got into an argument with your best friend, received negative feedback at work, or found out that your significant other lied to you. For many, the primary impulse when they are having a bad day is to try to escape from their feelings — often through drinking alcohol, emotional over-eating, or by engaging in other self-harming behaviors. However, I would argue that it is much healthier to “lean into” your pain when you are feeling sad than to avoid your uncomfortable feelings.

Quiet the voice telling you to do more and be more, and today, whatever you do, let it be enough.
It is OK — even essential — to experience “bad days.” The problem arises when we attempt to avoid unpleasant feelings. Acceptance and commitment therapy suggests that suffering is caused primarily through experiential avoidance. Psychologist Larry Berkelhammer defines experiential avoidance as “the attempt to avoid unpleasant thoughts, images, feelings, sensations, and emotions.” Here are my best tips for getting through a bad day without employing any potentially destructive techniques to numb yourself.

1. Accept your painful emotions.

Society teaches us that we should fear uncomfortable or unpleasant feelings. Nothing could be further from the truth. Accept that it is normal to have “bad days” and subsequent negative feelings. Think of your feelings as waves in an ocean. They will come and go, rise and fall. No feeling lasts forever, and anger and sadness are necessary, helpful parts of the human experience.

Larry Berkelhammer said, “Feelings of sadness, anger, frustration, anxiety, and grief—the emotions we are most likely to try to avoid—are normal and healthy… It is through our inner experience that we interact with our environment. If we tamp that experience down, we cannot live fully, nor can we grow.”

2. Show yourself compassion through self-care.

Often we“beat ourselves up when we’re having a bad day, but this is when it’s especially critical to practice self-compassion. Kristin Neff, a psychologist and researcher, stated that to practice self-compassion is, “to treat ourselves with the same kindness, caring, and compassion we would show to a good friend, or even a stranger for that matter.” Rather than shaming yourself for having a bad day or for feeling terrible, try to engage in some self-compassion and self-care.

Try journaling your feelings, taking a bubble bath, calling a supportive friend or family member, playing with animals, looking up positive quotes, letting………..

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